Sunday, August 24, 2014

Colouring Book Theatre: Dune Activity Book

DUNE: Puzzles, Games, Mazes and Activities

This is my third pass 
(you can read parts one and two hereat Dune coloring books or as I like to call them, "Comedy Gold"

The book promises you can "relive all excitement and adventure from the movie" but as we all know, crosswords and poorly thought out games rarely do that, even with good subject matter.

This is in no way a poke at the quality of the film but more of a comment on the weird belief it was somehow marketable to children.

Dune is a dark, often gory ride with a narrative that would confuse a lot of kids. Yet, licensing people sold it as the next Star Wars and here we are.

The other reason I keep returning to Arakis (see what I did there?) is the hope I find a colouring book page of Sting in his metal underwear, I WILL FIND YOU!

Grab your crayons and still suit and join me after the jump

Batman coloring book

I like the semi smile put on this character, I'm positive that every character in Dune just sorta frowned.  

Dune coloring book

"The Big Baron" sounds like a jolly fellow or a regional burger chain that is no longer. The lead villain of Dune is a hyper obese monster covered in oozing boils that sucks blood kids. Don't try to put perfume on this pig Grosset and Dunlap.

Dune coloring book

Characters like the Baron somehow had people thinking they had the next "Star Wars", what they got was the next "Krull".

To get all serious for a minute (well as serious as I get) "Last Starfighter" toys never hit the market but this guy was found under the tree on Christmas morning? 

Dune coloring book

I think I'll draw a little suit on this make it a Dale Cooper paper doll, then I can sell it to my unsuspecting podcast co-host for triple the price.

Dune coloring book

I think the better question is "Who is overacting in this scene?"

Batman coloring book

Send your friends these postcards and guaranteed they'll call you and ask "WTF did you just send me?"


Anonymous said...

The Paul paper doll's kind of cool, despite looking like someone drew it with their foot.

Shlomo Ben Hungstien said...

this book is so ridiculous like you said what were they thinking when they came up with the idea something like this would appeal to the pre-teen crowd?

Seventiesfan said...

"They'll think you're spaced out." I think that says it all. I've been reading some of your other Colouring Book Theatre, and you actually do like a few coloring books like Flash Gordon and Monster Squad. I have a Wonder Woman colouring book on the way, and I'm waiting to bid on another one. I'm also trying to find that Super Friends colouring book (the "seaweed" one) that I had once upon a time.

Alphacentaurian said...

I would pay serious bread for some Krull action figgas! :)

Anonymous said...

The 80's and there merchendising for films....bizzare...kinda luv that we got messed up things like this though.

Anonymous said...

Now there are some words you want to put in a children's activity book. "Jihad", "Holy War". and talk about "cleansing the universe and bringing us out of darkness." Not to mention the part about "voices from the outer world".
Oh and "They'll think you're spaced out." This is so pre 9/11, pre drug war and getting tons of crap past censors. Those were the good old days.


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